The Color of the Sun

Brr. I am cold. The heater "works" but only if you're touching it. My mother told me to get a heating pad to sleep with. I wonder if they even sell those in Holland. I've never seen one. Not that I've ever looked.... Oh well, soon it'll be too hot to sleep! :-D

Today was windy and cold, but the sun was shining. Most of the time. When it wasn't, it was pouring rain. But that didn't happen much, and it didn't last long. I wandered through the market one last time before Cairo. Flashlights have been acquired. I need to get some sunglasses too, I imagine, but I'm having a hard time. I'm just not made to wear them. My eyes are dark, and I'm from a sunny land, and my soul is from an even more tropical place, so I almost never need them. Though I imagine if you ever need sunglasses, it's in a place like Egypt. But, I look like a bug, no matter how small or large the lenses. 8-P Oh well, I'll just have to be buggy.

I wandered, and when I got cold I perched in a comfy chair at Coffee Star and read most of "I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings" by Maya Angelou. It wasn't quite what I was expecting, but it's good. I sat there and watched the weather dance across the sky now and then, until the library closed. Then I headed home.

And I packed. I leave in 4 days (it's after midnight Sunday morning as I write this) so I don't need too many clothes. I stuffed everything I want to take into my suitcase, and I'm just about ready to go! Packed and counting down the days! :-D

It still hasn't really sunk in that I'm going. I thought it would have by now, since my exam is over and I know I passed. Perhaps the change is just too big, too sudden, too soon. I don't think I ever really let myself believe that Egypt really exists. I study the ancient country and it is dead and crumbling in the desert, no matter how loudly it speaks to me. I remember the first time I went to Rome. I knew in the logical part of myself that, of course, it was a modern city, but the part of me that knew Rome, knew the ancient city, and was shocked at all the noise and the cars, and the... well, modernity. I quickly came to love Rome, of course, but I was deeply disappointed that it wasn't the white city of marble that covers those seven hills of my mind.

Egypt is even more important to my dreams than Rome. So many nights I've dreamed of watching the sun set into the Nile, and the whole world was peaceful, and the sky and the river glowed orange in the fading light, somehow brighter, more vivid even than the noontime sun. But there are no cities in my dreams, only reeds and sand and water. And the color of the sun.

I cannot prepare myself for this place. I cannot imagine that my Egypt, my vibrant, living and breathing, joyful Egypt has sunk into the sands. I cannot prepare myself for this city, modern, and loud, busy and noisy. I just have to go there, and see if I can love this Egypt that has risen.

The sun hasn't changed, at least. The ancient Egyptian sun will still shine on me. So what's the difference, really? :-P

Happy Diwali everyone!

Cairo: 4 days, Koos: 31 days